I know, we all love what we do, iron is therapy, etc. But i also know, once you decide to compete, you can say bye bye to being satisfied again. The day you decide to get big, is the day you decide to be small forever because you can never be big enough. Its like chasing the magic dragon i think. Let me tell you a short story about my first prep for stage early this year and how it changed me.

The year before I did my last JUDO competitions, I was satisfied because I did great results. Than i thought it is time to step on a bodybuilding stage. I was training 5-6 years with the iron and did martial arts for over 20 years at this point. I applied for the german newcomer round and want to do the prep by myself, because why pay a lot of money for someone who tells me what to do when i know what to do? (of course i didn't). Fully motivated I did myself a plan when what to eat and how to train, did it for 2 weeks and then the nightmare began. The scale went up instead of going down and the first doubts were plant in my head. I started to overthink if i am doing right, at first 1-3 times a day.... a week later I were doubting the whole day so I changed my plan for the next two weeks to see what will happen. After a few days I changed again, and again, and again... I dropped my food intake after 10 weeks under 2000kcal which was way to less for a guy like me, but it works..of course it works, my body started to eat itself :D in my opinion I was in a good condition and for the semi finals of the newcomer round ( 4 weeks before the real comp.) i wanted to bring a good package and tried to do a water cut and a carb loading, a dirty load like I saw at some bodybuilders to get huge full muscles. Pow, I did anything wrong as I could :D to say short, after 3 days of drinking 10-12 L water a day and eating no carbs I started eating A LOT of cupcakes, cookies, chocolate, ice cream etc. and I thought this much sugar would make me look like hulk...Of course it did not, at the semi finals I looked like a fluffy spongebob and gained 4-5 kg over this bad weekend. After the destroying statements of the jury and wanted to quit, then I wanted to give 120% and win...Then I wanted to quit again, win again...and this mindset changed every hour. I was like maniac depressive for the next 4 weeks. (Believe me, I am one of the happiest man alive because my girl is still with me.)

But, I did it. 2 days before the competition I was in a good shape, the water cut worked and I decide to do a clean carb load. Until Friday my look was incredible, but then I overload and over night the water went back under my skin, I looked like shit ( in my opinion). I presented myself on stage very confident and it was really fun, we all were newbies so it was ok to has done the faults.

The following days were very sentimental, thinking about to do it again or not, what to change, to do better, or to quit complete to compete.

My girl pleased me to take some help if I want to do again. She knows me, I am not the trying guy. I am that 100% or nothing guy and I will never give up no matter how much I failed. Now i have been working with one of the best coaches in germany for over half year and I do my 100% day in day out with the luxury that he makes the plan. I just have to do it, to stay positive, clap for my god damn self and bring my best package in autumn 2019 back on stage.

100% or Nothing

Carlo “Eisen“ Meyer